moo

step to the left step to the right, booty shake booty shake, chest pump, arms in the air, twist twist... I like to dance to fergie when i get ready in the mornings. Today it was fergalicious. Hair in a towl, fluffy white robe on and i'm workin' it out. Not only are my moves GOOD, but i feel like i'm getting a little bit of a workout in since I couldn't force myself to go to the gym since... well it doesn't matter when the last time was.
Awwww sweet little moo is watching me and jumping around and "oooowowwwwowowowo" nails tooooo long. Dancing my way over to her toenail clippers I have her sit down and take her first paw... clip... clip...clip... "uhh what's that?" blood? oooh I got a little too close.. "uh oh uh oh uh oh, lots of blood now!!" fighting back tears and a wommity feeling i grab a towel and hold that cute foot still. Somewhere in there I forgot to breathe and "why is everything getting black?" I feel really really hot! Sweat on my forehead... I rip the towel off my head and tear my robe off and so i continue to sit in all my naked, wet hair, fergalicious state trying to get my puppy's toenail to clot.
*sigh* good morning wednesday.

The surprising uses of nail polish!

So nail polish is what has been on my mind the last few days. In the past I've looked at women with the long square nails, painted bright red tapping with the pads of their fingers but still managing to lightly tap a completely different letter with nail. clack, clack, clack, clack.. we have all see and heard this!!! The only use of artificial nails is for back scratching, but seriously how many people with itchy backs do you know, let alone ones that want you to touch them and possibly claw rather than scratch? Ok this was not my point I was trying to make... Besides the long square nails, I used to really really dislike nail polish and couldn't understand why anyone would wear it. Well... the last few days I have been dabbling some in the arts of nail painting featuring "reddy or not", "flert alert" and one other that had a fun, can't resist painting me this name. After that first stroke of bright red on my thumb nail... i felt something... I wasn't even sure what it was until the next day at work! Every time I signed a document, every time I handed over material to a fellow employee, every time I typed on my computer... my eyes were drawn to one thing, my nails! I felt... POWER!!! I was in control! I was better than every unpainted nail in the place! Which is a lot since there are mainly men here, but still... POWER! CONTROL... I have to breathe! If someone were to give me attitude in my mind I'd be thinking..."woah woah woah... see these nails? I think you should reconsider!" Who knew Nail polish could affect someone like that? Also.. the bright color covers any dirt that might gather under your nails during the day and by doing so shoot down you're confidence. Yes... bright nail polish might be the answer to any insecureties! 

As I predicted, I only have 2 followers here on my blog. My sister and my mother. Does anyone agree with me that it seems a little suspicious that anyone who reads your blog is considered "your follower"? By having a blog you are either asking people to stalk you or trying to create a cult. At least that's what it would look like to someone who didn't understand blogging... It's cleverly hidden in "this is an outlet for you to express yourself".. hmmm i wonder. I halfway feel as though I'm going to have a burning fica tree on my apartment porch for my cult. mainly because my cult would never kill harmless animals or a cross. that's just BAD taste!!! hmmm i'll have to remove my patio furniture...



Before I leave off today, for those who read my blog about the laffy taffy..... twizzle sticks work the same way. Also if you ever want anything just mention how much that thing bothers you or in my case (makes me drool) and the people who love you will make sure you have plenty. Thanks Laura Q. :P